Why must I love myself before I can love you?
If I don’t love myself, I can’t begin to even feel your love.
I have spent my lifetime going through the motions.
Feeling moments of joy between long stretches of empty.
I can’t receive your love because it simply doesn’t compute.
I believe deep inside I’m not good enough, unlovable.
Of course it’s true; my own mother gave me away!*
Nothing you say can change this feeling deep within me.
It doesn’t come from logic, so it won’t be outsmarted.
No love language can sneak love past these beliefs.
God bless every single person who has tried. Seriously!
As I learn to love myself, these beliefs begin to dissolve.
I can start to feel some of the immense love I’ve been given.
It’s almost daunting enough to close back up again…
But I don’t. I won’t! I know now that I deserve it all.
How long I’ve thought myself impatient…all the while waiting.
Waiting to feel good enough. Trying to earn my way there.
Waiting to feel lovable. Trying to look and give my way there.
Totally lost in the outer world, desperately seeking completion.
Patiently wondering if I’d ever have what my heart craves.
Now, like the Wizard of Oz, I find I’ve had it all along!
As I feel God’s love and learn to love myself unconditionally,
I feel my fears and insecurities and self-hatred melt away.
I understand the only one who ever abandoned me was ME.
I know I AM DIVINE. I feel COMPLETE. I FEEL love.
What will it be like to make choices from a place of wholeness?
Not to need to complete myself with anything or anyone?
This is what I’ve waited for my whole life! Me, Ms Impatient. Ha!
What a Journey of Possibilities is this life!
Ultimately a journey from the self back to the self
Through every other possibility we can imagine
Only to find love back at the beginning again!
Founder, Journey of Possibilities
*No victimhood here – I know as a soul I asked her to, though the ‘why’ has only become apparent in recent years.
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