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How to Become Less Critical of Others (& Happier With Ourselves)

imagesDo you expect others to follow through on what they say they’ll do?  How do you feel if they don’t?

Do you become quickly frustrated when you don’t feel others are doing their fair share?

Are you someone who does their very best in everything, and expects everyone else to do the same?

What happens when people fall short of our high expectations?  How do we feel inside?  Do we slow down to even feel the sensations that are happening to us, or do we just keep right on forging ahead valiantly, mumbling about how, if we want something done right, we’d better just do it ourselves?

I feel your pain.  As a teenager, my life worked best when I made As in school, helped around the house, and was as little ‘bother’ as possible.  I grew up with that perfectionism deeply seeded within me, completely forgetting that I wasn’t happy living life in that extreme state.  I moved along doing my very best and expecting the world around me to do the same.  When I or they fell short of perfect (yeah, constantly!), I was frustrated.  Gee, I wonder where the substance abuse and eating disorders came from?  Something had to give somewhere!

If you know me or follow my blog, you know that I also suffered sexual and verbal abuse in my childhood.   I mention this because if you’re a survivor of any type of childhood trauma, that only fuels our desire to either (a) rebel later, or (b) paint such a lovely life picture that we don’t have to feel or deal with that anymore.   However, after years of playing that game, we reach a point where the illusion is shattered and we are left facing the truth: we are not perfect, no one else is perfect, and we have some pain to heal. 

It’s not easy going into deep inner healing and feeing that stuff again, but positive natural healing paths keep us moving along through the pain so that it’s more about the growth and lessons of the pain than it is going back and reliving it again.  We feel, learn, heal, and release it.  As we move through this process, we begin to laugh at how silly those perfect expectations are.  We begin to give ourselves a break, and as we treat ourselves, so we treat the world.  Gradually and permanently we feel less and less concern for the perfection of others or ourselves.  Life eases up…a LOT!

Judgment and criticism are big red flags to ourselves and the world that there’s some healing work to do within.  Rather than appearing all together and successful, the enlightened person sees simply our pain bubbling just below the surface, being suppressed.

If this blog is describing you, I send you much love and Light from deep within my heart.  I’ve sat in that painful place, and I know how difficult it is trying to keep things perfect all of the time.  LET IT GO.  Begin slowly to allow yourself to go into healing that inner critic and that hurt child.  However difficult you may fear it will be, the beauty along this path is indescribable!  Truly.

With much love,

Sheryl Sitts, MPA, BA

Founder & Chief Inspirational Officer

Journey of Possibilities

JOIN US JULY 22nd RIGHT HERE ONLINE as we launch our brand new ONLINE HOLISTIC COMMUNITY!  Creating a safe place for individuals to ask questions, seek answers, discuss, and explore holistic, ‘green’, organic, and metaphysical alternatives for health and wellness.  We will have forums for open discussion, informative articles written by professionals touting the benefits of their types of products/services, a provider directory, opinion polls, podcasts interviewing experts, testimonials on holistic healing results, and much more.  If you are a provider, contact me now to be involved.  If you are simply interested in exploring, we urge you to come and be a part of our excitement.  Namaste.

Sheryl’s Blog

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