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Habits: Free Will in Bondage

FreeWillLately I’ve been discovering how I unconsciously push some people away when they get ‘too close’.  It’s actually much more complex than it sounds.  When some people get ‘too close’, my mind starts playing tricks with me about what they really want from me, how they’ll probably go away soon anyway, etc. until suddenly I’m withdrawing from a perfectly good friendship, romance, etc. for no reason at all!   It’s scary to me that I can do all of this now without even realizing what I’m doing.   What began in childhood (doesn’t everything?) to keep me safe then became an option in a couple of unhappy relationships and then a habit until now I’m not even aware that I do it.  Something that was once free will has over time become something that quietly runs in the background sabotaging my relationships.

This is only one example.  Whether it’s how we drive, what we eat, vices we try, the way we are with money, how we resolve conflict, or many other things, the same holds true.  There is an initial moment of consciousness when we freely choose.  If  it’s important enough, we’ll even get nervous about the possibilities and weigh out our options before we choose.  If our choice serves us well then, the next time we may more quickly return to the same choice.  After a few times, or when we’re too busy to spend time thinking about it, we may repeat the choice again after barely slowing down to weigh the options.  Before we know it, we’re still behaving that way 5…10…30 years later!  The situation has changed, the people are different, and WE’RE different, but we’re still doing that same old thing with no idea why or even that we are!  How much of our lives are run on autopilot?  And what does it take to get our attention?  Bankruptcy?  A heart attack?  Divorce?  Something else?

Free will can only exist in this moment.  The past is history and we may not even see the future.  All we have is this very moment.  All our multitasking keeps us too distracted to be in this right-now moment that is our Divine gift.   We stay in autopilot.   We are the only ones who can make the conscious choice to live in this moment EVERY moment.  Anything else is robbing ourselves of a precious human birthright: FREE WILL!   Here’s to conscious living – right here, right now.

Namaste and much love,

Sheryl Sitts, Chief Inspirational Officer

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